Fresh Tweets We Fished From the Bird App (February 2, 2023)

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  • 01
    Font - Chris Murphy @christress once i invent a beverage that makes you want to keep living between 3:15 and 4:48 pm it's over for you hoes 4:40 PM 1/30/23 2.8M Views . 90.5K Likes 6,605 Retweets 573 Quotes
  • 02
    Font - Bromosapien @Himbo_Suave Always Sunny needs to make an episode where they kidnap Patrick Mahomes before the superbowl but they accidentally grab his brother by mistake. 9:02 AM 1/30/23 1.1M Views . 22.9K Likes 1,879 Retweets 95 Quotes
  • 03
    Font - James Fritz @fritzisdead HBO took understanding that people get a little sad on Sunday nights and built that into an empire. 1:06 PM 1/30/23 1.4M Views 63.6K Likes 5,306 Retweets 121 Quotes
  • 04
    Font - Press pudding person @JUNIPER the fact there hasn't been any new internet famous cat for the last couple of years is a sign of the oncoming apocalypse 10:39 PM 1/30/23 3.3M Views . . 77.7K Likes 5,210 Retweets 1,802 Quotes
  • 05
    Font - Just Bill @WilliamAder Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something? 11:30 AM 1/30/23 84.9K Views . 2,769 Likes 574 Retweets 12 Quotes
  • 06
    Font - Lily The Cable Guy @lilyblueyez "This is she" - my mom answering the phone 6:18 PM 1/29/23 3M Views . 73.3K Likes 3,209 Retweets 762 Quotes
  • 07
    Jeans - juju s @ayeejuju PLEASE tell me that's a 5 ... 11:37 PM 1/29/23 4.7M Views . 114K Likes 4,718 Retweets 461 Quotes
  • 08
    Product - martyna chicago 6/4 @breakble_heaven BLAKE 19:26 blakelively 20m ∞ Boomerang by instagram > I bought espn+ today. Just to watch my husband experience crippling anxiety live. WRE 62:07 Worth it. Evancityreynolds 1:26 PM 1/29/23 11.3M Views : x
  • 09
    Shorts - THE lusty argonian maid @lindawg thrifted a LEGO ski jacket & my bf won't stop walking around like a roblox character THE ORIGINAL 9 - RE THE ORIGINAL
  • 10
    Plant - Paul Griffiths @paul_griffiths Whole Foods is out here tearing families apart WHOLE FOODS MARKET 99482 Mom's Chicken Soup PERISHABLE | KEEP REFRIGERATED NET WT 24 0Z (1 LB 8 0Z) 680g 2:48 PM 1/29/23 879K Views . WHOLE FOODS MARKET Nana's Chicken Noodle Soup PERISHABLE | KEEP REFRIGERATED NET WT 240Z (1 LB 8 0Z) 680g $8.4⁹9 19.9K Likes 1,808 Retweets 143 Quotes Na No Whole Foods Market Nana's Ch Soup
  • 11
    Font - caitlin berg @c8linberg LGBTQ+ friendly Guantanamo Bay Detention Camp Centro de detención de Guantánamo Prison Directions 0 Save Nearby Claim this business LGBTQ+ friendly WW33+68Q, Guantanamo Bay Naval Base, Cuba Send to your phone Send to phone 12:37 PM 1/30/23 1M Views Share 42K Likes 2,961 Retweets 169 Quotes
  • 12
    Photograph - im silly selma @selmacashmoney imagine being blind and then the first thing you see after your life changing surgery is this S 8:36 PM 1/29/23 2.2M Views ... 112K Likes 3,757 Retweets 216 Quotes
  • 13
    Font - Corn * @upblissed drake had you niggas putting hearts that looked like ballsacks in yo haircuts dont think i forgot 4:17 PM 1/30/23 690K Views . 17.3K Likes 1,194 Retweets 77 Quotes
  • 14
    Font - ēdē @FineAssldi I asked this lady behind me at the supermarket if she could hold my spot real quick she said no. Thats crazy i never heard that Imao 12:50 PM 1/29/23 5.1M Views 120K Likes 5,958 Retweets 1,638 Quotes
  • 15
    Font - Scott Langford, PhD @scottlangford22 Student: Can I miss class on X date? I'm a bartender at the hotel Rihanna and the team owners are staying at for the Super Bowl and expect good tips. Me: Yes. 12:43 PM 1/29/23 from North Carolina, USA. 2.2M Views .. 53.4K Likes 1,654 Retweets 160 Quotes
  • 16
    Organism - Jonathan @jonathanmb32 Ya know what fine I'll allow it Cocaine Bear 1h 35m 2023 COCAINE Thriller An oddball group of cops, criminals, tourists, and teens converge in a Georgia forest where a 500-pound black bear goes on a murderous rampage... ... All Jonathan @jonathanmb32. 11/30/22 If Cocaine Bear comes in under 95 minutes I will be 100% on board
  • 17
    Font - Jennifer Greenberg @JennMGreenberg So I gave 6YO a grilled cheese sandwich. She gasped, "Mom! You made me this sandwich one time, and I've been wanting you to make it again for like 50 years, but I didn't know what it was called!" 9:06 PM 1/29/23 888K Views 28.3K Likes 930 Retweets 79 Quotes
  • 18
    Font - Justin @JustThomp "This isn't Southwest. We sit in our assigned seats that we're given. The reason we're running a little late today is some people aren't following these rules, and those people are the Sanchez family." My flight attendant is a Queen. 9:23 AM 1/30/23 341K Views ... 8,338 Likes 204 Retweets 24 Quotes
  • 19
    Font - @dunwall imagine being smug thinking you know everything that's going to happen on The Last of Us show already bc you played the game and then they show you a gay version of Up 9:59 PM 1/29/23 1.6M Views . 38.2K Likes 3,004 Retweets 356 Quotes
  • 20
    Gesture - jon drake @DrakeGatsby Toyotathon should be its own month LIVE Following For You me explaining that if we had 13 months instead of 12, every month would be exactly 28 days, the 1st would always be a monday, and the 28th would always be a sunday, every month would have exactly 4 weeks instead of 4.257, and we would properly align ourselves with the cycle of the moon. samjwilber original sound - valerieloverrrr 1.8M 13.6K 105.1K 9527
  • 21
    Font - rock and roll photos @yesitsmyaccount It's so funny how every single video essay YouTuber mispronounces at least one extremely common word 10:47 PM 1/28/23 1.5M Views 45.7K Likes 1,702 Retweets 171 Quotes
  • 22
    Font - Soren Iverson @soren_iverson Uber Hotbox option More UNIVCIS Select 4 8:17pm 12 min away Premium rides in high-end cars Hotbox 4 8:11pm 6 min away Drivers that don't mind the devil's lettuce WAV 4 8:13pm 8 min away Wheelchair-accessible rides $21.08 VISA .... 1249 Assist: 4 8:13pm 8 min away Special assistance from certified drivers. 10:01 AM 1/30/23 357K Views $14.01 $13.93 $14.12 2,520 Likes 136 Retweets 37 Quotes >
  • 23
    Font - bobby payne @hoopgoth is anyone else following the tik tok saga of the guy fermenting kimchi on the game floor at dave and busters? (im so mad i had to string those words together) 1:29 PM 1/28/23 511K Views .. 6,225 Likes 174 Retweets 28 Quotes
  • 24
    Font - Isaac Feldberg @isaacfeldberg Can you imagine if Cate Blanchett wins for TÁR and the orchestra tries to play her off 12:44 AM 1/31/23 580K Views 11K Likes 594 Retweets 71 Quotes
  • 25
    Lip - discount Robert Pattinson @dummiehere they can't keep getting away with this 4:31 Search let's go swimming and get sushi after.... Now replace the s with an m cal_gif 1-8 what do you think ♫ music from: More M's - Drak Search 5:37 PM 1/28/23 2.2M Views 290
  • 26
    Font - Robby Kalland @RKalland burger king should have a somber version of the whopper song they play in commercial breaks after an injury like the fox injury music 3:10 PM 1/29/23 860K Views 13.7K Likes 935 Retweets 23 Quotes
  • 27
    Font - Isaac Wilks @wilks_isaac When I was about 12 I became a Foreman on a Minecraft server that was building a 1-to-1 scale replica of Middle Earth. They gave me a team of corvée laborers and I'd have them dig ditches, redirect canals etc. This was something you did in the Qing Dynasty in like 1895 6:05 PM 1/29/23 3.2M Views 75.1K Likes 4,771 Retweets 249 Quotes
  • 28
    Font - Priya @priya_ebooks dating someone who's Offline is so funny. my partner just texted me a video "this amazing performance omg u have to see it" IT IS TOM HOLLAND LIP SYNCING 'UMBRELLA' 6:42 AM 1/28/23 3.4M Views . 137K Likes 4,445 Retweets 650 Quotes
  • 29
    Font - Benji Jones @BenjiSJones My parents inadvertently booked a stay at a gay resort in the Caribbean. They are 72. They are not gay. One of the pools is clothing optional. Excited for them. 5:02 PM 1/30/23 2.9M Views .. . 55.6K Likes 1,748 Retweets 253 Quotes
  • 30
    Font - Jordan Woodson @jordanjwoodson I am BEGGING TikTok to learn what a horror/comedy is LIVE Following For You The menu is supposed to be scary but it's so funny please LIVE Following For You When MEGAN-started singing Titanium and everyone started laughing 1101 comments kathyjuin i am convinced megan is a comedy 2d Reply Liked by creator 1:55 PM 1/29/23 1.2M Views 15.6K andreclemons6 It kinda reminded me of the Scream movies where it's a horror movie but doesn't take itself too seriously...
  • 31
    Sleeve - zach silberberg @zachsilberberg i know its bad form to take pictures of strangers on the train but this is the hardest jacket ive ever seen 13 AFFAE INTERVIEW WITH του THE VAMPIRE FILM CREW 1994 GEFFEN
  • 32
    Font - broti gupta @BrotiGupta One time when we were visiting colleges for my sister we were on a tour led by this British girl except then halfway through the tour she dropped her accent and said she was a theater major and that's how strong the theater program at that college was 12:50 AM 1/31/23 554K Views . 10.4K Likes 301 Retweets 39 Quotes
  • 33
    Font - Eric Goldman @TheEric Goldman There is a scene in The Last of Us game where Ellie finds Bill's porno mag with a dude on the cover and notes some of the pages are stuck together and some people who played the game are STILL watching the TV show going, "Wait, he's WHAT?!" 12:47 AM 1/30/23 1.6M Views . .. 35.7K Likes 2,046 Retweets 130 Quotes
  • 34
    Font - 7A toxic king @777jorgeivan From "i love you" to "user not found" a true love story 6:11 PM 1/30/23 2.8M Views 55.4K Likes 12.1K Retweets 1,105 Quotes
  • 35
    Product - IN $werv @swervjoy The way you dressed you gotta be in dubi Asian Doll In Dubi @AsianDaBrattt. 1d . ANGELE CALIFORNIA 5:49 AM 1/30/23 3.5M Views ANGELS CALIFORNIA 1300 41.5K Likes 3,630 Retweets 388 Quotes
  • 36
    Font - jay @jayythewave i hate websites ask "are you human" nah i'm a pack of oatmeal cookies. 8:30 PM 1/30/23 424K Views 14.8K Likes 2,829 Retweets 167 Quotes
  • 37
    Font - Bread Pyramid Thing @redpyrameadhead Everybody wants a goth girl til they're asking you to pick up a Victorian copper toilet from Facebook marketplace
  • 38
    Organism - Elizabeth Sampat @twoscooters Someone asked Al to make a sign language manual, in case you're worried that we'll all be out of a job soon ILIG AWY SINWRI alut JUN LA IHONIALLLILAL 30 LLUM A BNAGN ALA AE ind e bnimitilard a d ithe ne shertoleiad ha . SOLLING GIANASCAN 11:27 AM 1/28/23 1.3M Views SLLOLLARANN 21.7K Likes 3,864 Retweets 839 Quotes SSH3L4SKOV
  • 39
    Font - the vampire boochie @eviloldlady the moral of "the menu" is that if you are a customer you should die 11:57 PM 1/28/23 306K Views . 15.6K Likes 1,783 Retweets 90 Quotes

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